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  • While much of the nation is cloaked in a sheet of ice

    here in OK we are having record high temperatures this week. It is currently 8:20 am and 65 degrees, the expected high is to be in the 70-80 degree range today. This makes me very NERVOUS about the possibility of tornadoes.
    Last week saw me being “real friendly” with the budget AGAIN, still tweaking the budget flip flop and trying to streamline it a bit. One of the things I’ve done is instead of trying to have a set sinking fund for every single little thing I calculated how much could be comfortably put back into a general sinking fund account. It’s basically the same amount going in each month as when we kept them separate, but instead of spending a lot of bookkeeping time designating that it is for this sinking fund or that it is now just a general fund that I will put a cap on for total to be in there. I’m still working on deciding how high that cap should be because as we all know more than one sinking fund might need to be tapped in a single month. Once that cap is reached I plan on replenishing that fund with any monies that are available asap when some of the money is used just like I do the emergency fund. I may change my mind about doing it this way in the future, but for right now it’s a way to streamline the bookkeeping system and make it easier for dh and ds to handle should I be unavailable.On the subject of replenishing the bef, we should be able to do that part of the “pay back” this next pay day because dh worked 17.5 overtime hours over the weekend and may be working more this week. How they will handle this and which check it will be on for certain is still up in the air. If it’s like other employers have been it should all work out just fine. Because the number of hours on each paycheck can fluctuate wildly I have started a spreadsheet to keep track of what paychecks of various hours are to help me budget more efficiently in the future.

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  • Well I’ll ask a tough question

    or two just trying to get greater understanding. First, I’m going to assume that you don’t live in a community property state. Otherwise it really doesn’t matter whose name is on what.The next question is does he do legal gambling (Professional) or is this more of the seedy side where I can imagine he has debts.Legal gambling, those losses are covered immediately and winnings are paid just as quickly.I ask all of that to say that you might have to put his gambling debts in the budget to provide peace of mind going forward.

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  • I want to thank everyone for the words of advice so far

    It will take me a minute to get all my debts together but I will post those as soon as I can. I do want to answer Jan’s question in regards to DH.My dh is a lifelong gambler. He started at 18 and never stopped. I didn’t realize just how bad it was until after we were married. It has taken several years and lots of heartache. We have finally found a system that works for us. Nothing is in my husband’s name and we share no accounts. When he works which is rare, we do direct deposit directly into to my account. I don’t carry cash and I don’t give him access to my debit cards. We stopped using credit along time ago. The one vehicle we have is only in my name. DH realizes that cash in hand is a major issue but I can not get him to go to outside professional help. Currently he is serving the role as stay at home Dad. I am still conflicted about what decision I will ultimately make but right now I need to get things straight financially so I can make some clear headed decisions. When I say he doesn’t seem to be on board, I don’t mean he is spending cash per se.. for instance I shop with a very tight food budget and shop for specific meals. I know it sounds crazy but I will plan out meals for two weeks etc. Hubby seems to disregard this and will jus make some hamburgers for his friends one day and that can throw us off track. Sometimes I feel like the worst person by locking down the food, and gas supply. Dh doesn’t get that 5 dollars here or there adds up. I know this part of the issue and me not saying no in the past that I am thinking of including a line item in our budget that accounts for his costs per month. I read TMMO and know that both spouses need to be on the plan for this to work . I am at least trying to get in a position to move on if that’s what I chose.

    Long winded I know but I hope that explains some things.

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  • When you are listing things for either figuring your budget

    When you are listing things for either figuring your budget on your own or with our help you need to include EVERYTHING, haircuts, gym shoes, scout fees, and blow money—yes blow money. Everyone gets some. The Total Money Maker Over is the best place to start if you are not in Financial Peace University (FPU) You can get it for free from your local library. Read it make notes, copy the forms in the back of the book and ask questions here. There is no such thing as a bad or stupid question, except the one you don’t ask. So ask away.You will notice the mention of homework here. It is a voluntary thing we do every Monday. We report to each other the advances and back steps we each take. It helps us see where we’ve made mistakes or had great success and the group will encourage you along the way. Also once a month there is a voluntary reporting to Sharon (if she is still up for doing it for 2013) our individual monthly debt payoff. Then at the end of the year Sharon tells us how the group did as a whole. It’s a pretty impressive amount!Oh, another thing you will see mention of is Pollyanna Pills. It’s an inside joke here. I got the reputation of being a Pollyanna (as in the Disney film with Pollyanna who always found the bright side in everything) when I announced the day that my guys lost their jobs that it was the best thing that ever happened to us. You know what I was right. Anyway, if someone is having a down day/week/month we issue an rx for Pollyanna pills.We are like a big old family, and just like a big old family we will ask you the tough questions. I’ll ask the first ones, because I foresee a possible stumbling block in your path to financial freedom. Is your husband getting help with his gambling problem? How are you dealing with it? Are you enabling him? Please don’t feel upset that I/we ask such questions. We all have some problem that we must deal with. It might not be gambling, it might be being able to say no to a family member/friend over and over again(our biggest problem in this household—it took us a long time to grow a backbone and learn to say no with conviction and stick to it), a collection habit, a hobby habit, a shoe habit, or the general “I WANT IT NOW” (envision Violet in Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory-oompah, oompah –sorry seeing little orange men). we have all had a stumbling block. We’ve all had to deal with it in some way or another. It’s what you do to deal with it that can make all the difference in your gazelle speed on getting debt free. Everyone here is good at offering suggestions. If our suggestions don’t work for you then that is fine. No too families are identical.

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  • As many already on the list know the first thing

    I generally say is “Breathe”. And that is what you need to do, slow down take a deep breath and know that no matter how bad it seems things will improve. You have taken the first major step. You acknowledged the fact that financially your life is out of control. Now you can fix it. No one here will promise you it will be easy, nor will we tell you that there won’t be set backs (aka: Murphy Moments), but we will tell you that there will be wonderful Millie Moments when you least expect it. A Millie Moment is a sudden good fortune, even if it’s only finding a really large coupon for something you truly need and are flat broke, or huge Millie Moments like a big bonus, pay raise or other windfall. When these Millie Moments hit you will be surprised to find how much differently you will look at that money in the future than how you did in the past.
    You’ve already received some wonderful advise from some folks. I’ll second all that has been said, but being the chatterbox I am I’ll explain them a bit more.
    Sharon mentioned weaning things out of your life. We each have “extras” in our budget that could truthfully go. I know when I first join the list nearly four years ago I was certain I could not cut anything out. The next month my dh and ds both lost their jobs on the same day and were unemployed for 18 months and I found we could REALLY cut the budget. Not only did we cut, but we even paid off some tiny bills while unemployed. Thankfully both men eventually got jobs again, at 25% less than they had previously been making, but they now work together again at a great company.Sara pointed out things like cutting your cable/satellite package, your cell phone plan, ending landlines etc. The best way we could all help both newbies in getting your personal finances under control is for you to list your complete income and outgo on here for us to help you look for places you could cut and soon be debt free. We don’t need exact company names or anything like that if you don’t want to do that, it’s understandable, discussing finances is rough for some people. Me I’m pretty blunt about it all, but then that’s me. List minimum monthly due, balance and if you are in arrears—don’t bother with interest rates because we do not look at those here at all.—except to try and help you get them lowered.If you don’t want to list the names of your bills then put cc (credit card) #1, #2 etc, if it’s in collections then mark that it is — By the way, many of us have seen the ugliest side of collections so you will be in good company. We can help you handle those bottom feeders and give the power back to you. Not them—they have NO POWER, do not let them bluff you. If they call and get nasty, hang up on them, you do not have to take it.

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  • Glad to have you here

    The first thing you need to do is catch up on all of your other household bills, like electricity, gas, water, – utilities. Once you get those bills current then you can begin to work in earnest on the Dave Ramsey Plan.To get caught up with the bills, sell those items which you no longer need or can afford such as cable/satellite TV, extra cell phones, a land line if everyone is dependent upon cell phones etc. Look seriously at the grocery budget, and what you’re buying in the grocery store. Start cooking more from scratch than the more expensive pre-fabricated mixes/kits etc. Learn to shop on the perimeter of the grocery store (fresh items, produce, meat, dairy) fresh frozen etc.We’ll ask you about specific budget items later, your first priority now that you’ve caught up your rent, is to get your household bills current.

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  • What you need to do

    What you need to do is figure out what you make and your monthly expenses. Once you have it WRITTEN down, you can act on it. Make sure your ‘4 walls’ are taken care of – housing, food, utilities, transportation. Those are things that MUST be paid. Everything else
    after that is negotiable. Do you have enough money to pay your current bills? If so, anything left over goes towards debt. List
    your debts lowest to highest. Make the minimum payments on all the debts except the smallest. Throw everything you can at that one.
    When that one is paid, take what you were paying them, and any other money you can squeeze out of your budget and pay on the next one.

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  • I want to introduce myself

    and ask for some assistance in where to get started. My friends call me Kat.. I am a Mom of 6 and work full time. My husband is currently not employed and has some gambling issues. All of our children live with us and one daughter is now expecting. 2 of the kids do contribute to the household. Our finances are a mess, some weeks we don’t have enough for food. Every single bill is behind. So far I have been robbing Peter to pay Paul. What I am most confused about is that I make a decent salary and bad choices I guess. Currently we are paying 2400 in rent monthly (current and past) because we were 5 months behind and I had to make an arrangement for us to stay in the house. Essentially we are living on 1400 a month. Our payment plan is done now and we will only have to pay the current. Because that 800 a month will be now available, I want to make sure I am making the right decisions. My fear is the other bills have suffered because we were focused on the rent. Any suggestions? I was not sure what other information to put out there.

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  • Ok. Since you asked – here goes..

    1. MLM is fatally flawed as a business model for distributors – It is DEGIGNED to make 99% distributors fail – why ? because of pt #1 in your post – about products being good for “own use”. Since you are a management student, I am sure you can figure that one out.

    2. Your assertion that people who eat at restaurants are somehow “losers” is very MLM conditioned – I have heard similar things from other bots – why watch TV when you can recruit, or even play golf when you can recruit ? I suppose winners only eat at restaurants when they can recruit everybody at the restaurant. So I would suggest that you drop this nonsensical crap – because lots of people eat at restaurants because they LIKE to….

    3. Your assertions about MLMs reducing distribution costs are patently false – if you compare prices of comparable products of any MLM to prices at Walmart or online retailers like amazon.com – you will see MLM products are outrageously overpriced – The only way you can sell at those prices is to a captive market – that is – to distributors – even that by hyping MLM products by making mostly baseless claims about their superiority.

    4. The BIGGEST LIE in MLM is actually that you are guaranteed to succeed if you work hard.

    5. MLM is not like any other business – so stop making that absurd comparision – and buying products for personal use does not constitute an “investment”.

    And finally, here’s something for you to ponder. ABSOLUTELY nothing you have said here is new. There are no revelations here – ask yourself how many 1000s of people -on this forum or elsewhere have made the same analysis as you and failed – and ask yourself why that may be ? Maybe you will learn something.

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  • I didn’t expect you to

    I make it a point to speak the truth and I’ve found people in MLMs don’t want to hear the truth. They believe what they want to hear and nothing else, no matter whether it is provable fact or not.

    That is one major part where you are showing that you just don’t have the experience or background to know what you’re talking about. If you want to understand, then do more research. Read the stores at the sites that are not pro-mlm. If you were really interested in dialog and learning, then you would have looked at BOTH sides of the issue, not just the people that say it’s good. How can you know that anything you think is true is true unless you’ve examined BOTH sides of the issue well THEN, and ONLY THEN, made up your mind?

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